Obviously the hideous items below aren't meant to be aesthetically pleasing; they're meant to be trendy, or fashion-forward, or avant-garde (or whatever).

But I still have three questions: who buys these things, who wears these things, and why would anyone make them? It’s a mystery to us all, but at least it's good writing inspiration.

Disclaimer: I’m not trying to say that no one could ever wear these items and look good (I’m sure someone, somewhere, could pull them off). To state the obvious: everyone should be able to wear whatever they want.

Also, I know slideshows are more annoying than a one-page post. But I couldn't figure out how to publish this as a single page from polyvore without losing the captions (which are clearly the best part). So you'll just have to put up with it.

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Hi there! I'm a writer and image consultant based in Montreal, Canada. Whatever your goals may be — whether in love, business, or life — I'm committed to helping you achieve them by improving your appearance.